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Stepping it up: Emmitt in overdrive


By ED BARK
No, he's not a shoe-in. But yes, he's going to win. Your faithful chronicler can feel it in his toes, which could use the manicure Emmitt Smith just got .

The ex-Cowboy and partner Cheryl Burke dominated Tuesday's latest Dancing with the Stars performance edition, serving notice that they're the new couple to beat among the hit ABC show's final five.

Their electrifying mambo merited a perfect 30, except that puny judge Bruno Tonioli unaccountably short-sheeted them with a 9 after raving, "Emmitt, the beast is unleashed!" The crowd's chorus of boos -- and this time they seemed genuine -- prompted host Tom Bergeron to jab, "Which of our low-paid staff members gets to start Bruno's car after the show?"

His fellow two judges scored it a 10, with Carrie Ann Inaba droolingly dubbing Emmitt "Sir Shimmy" after sticking him with "Twinkletoes" in the show's early going. Len Goodman called it the best dance he's seen during Dancing's ongoing third edition.

Emmitt and Cheryl, shown above doing the jive last week, warmed up with a smooth, assured waltz that nabbed a 28 score. Beforehand he joined Cheryl in getting a facial, a pedicure and some other soft touches at a Hollywood salon. "I think every man should get pampered," he said. "We should reward ourselves with some way of relaxing."

End result: "Oh yeah, I've got the prettiest male toes in all of L.A."

Let the record show he looked great in a long-tailed black tux, too. For the mambo, Emmitt switched to a shimmering red, open-collared shirt with suspenders and dark, pin-striped pants. We pause now for Uncle Barky to take a sedative and ponder the sad girlyman he's become while writing twice-weekly about Emmitt's post-football dance fever.

There, all better now.

The still smitten Inaba was the only judge to give Emmitt a pair of 10's. Said she: "Oh, the manly man does the waltz out there. And you nailed it. I was mesmerized by your footwork." Among other things.

Wednesday night's results show will tally judges' and viewers' votes on three dances. That's because ABC declined to evict anyone last week after country singer Sara Evans quit the show in the midst of messy divorce proceedings. Joey Lawrence and Jerry Springer were left hanging in the bottom two, with the talk show "icon" still sinking. His aggregate judges' score of 64 is by far the lowest. Emmitt's 82, which should be an 83, is second-best behind Mario Lopez's 84.

This was the night, though, that Emmitt moved into the pole position. Mario will be his only serious competition, but the deep-dimpled Saved By the Bell star won't be able to hold his ground against the NFL's all-time leading rusher.

Now Uncle Barky's going to re-sod a little hair on his chest by watching the World Series. The only dancing going on there is by Kenny "The Palm" Rogers.