Take it from Big Walt: CW33 news is full of $#!T
06/18/10 12:02 PM
By ED BARK
CW33 anchor Walt Maciborski, pictured above, clearly has been there, dung that.
The leading man of the station's 9 p.m. weekday "newscasts" now is stating the obvious in this latest ad touting CW33's determination to befoul TV news as we once knew it.
Calling attention to this stuff probably is only helping CW33 carve out its niche as the station to turn to for $#!T. And as unclebarky.com's latest D-FW ratings snapshot notes, this strategy may be starting to pay off. Which would be a big $&*!-ing shame in the long run.
Drinking news director David Duitch's Kool Aid -- some say he's merely assuming the position dictated by Tribune corporate -- has to be a hard swallow for at least some of the staffers at CW33. Maciborski doesn't seem to be among them, though. Lending your face to a campaign like this pretty much brands you for life. All that's missing is a $#!T-eating grin on his part.
Rival D-FW news directors and station managers can't believe what they're seeing on CW33. Believe me. But none are likely to come out and say so publicly. That would be breaking the code, even though the success or failure of CW33 and other Tribune-owned news purveyors could have a reverberating impact on stations still clinging to higher roads.
Here are some other suggested slogans for CW33:
All the news that's $#!T to air.
A-breast of all the action.
Holy crap! Did we just air a story on donkey shows in Tijuana?
Live, Nude Girls!
Our nipples are harder. Watch and see.
Breaking news on breaking wind!
We're ready to pleasure you.
We suck! Doesn't everybody?
Words we've used on our news: Tits, penis, pissed. (And we've only just begun).
Boy trapped in refrigerator eats own foot!
Our stories are always well-endowed.
Murrow, Cronkite -- Ick!