powered by FreeFind

Apple iTunes

Archives

Emmitt's super samba


By ED BARK
Cracked back into working order by a chiropractor, Emmitt Smith Elvis-ized himself into a gyrating samba on Tuesday's fifth edition of Dancing with the Stars.

The show's judges in turn rewarded the increasingly game former Cowboy with a show-closing 27 score. That put Emmitt (doing the paso doble in the above ABC photo) and partner Cheryl Burke in a four-way tie for first among the remaining seven competitors.

"Sonofagun, you are a party legend!" blurted ever-overblown Bruno Tonioli. "You're strutting your stuff with the best of them!"

Fellow judge Carrie Ann Inaba, who clearly yearns to sack the married Emmitt off the field, responded by shaking her own software at him. Sorry, the guy's already taken. While two of the dancing pairs continued to make infatuation connections, married Emmitt went back to Dallas to watch his daughter score five goals in a kid soccer game.

"Five bucks," she then told him. Maybe Terrell Owens can cover that.

"I don't even know what the samba is," Emmitt had said before experienced pro partner Cheryl Burke told him, "It's all about pelvis action, moving forward and back."

A variety of his body parts soon were aching, sending Emmitt to a chiropractor for a snap-pop, pick-me-up.

It got no racier than that. Emmitt dressed like a veritable monk in a monastery, wearing an orange shimmy shirt under a buttoned black vest. Even Jerry Springer showed lots more skin, with his black puffy shirt unbuttoned well south of the border.

Celebrity competitors Willa Ford and Mario Lopez flaunted appreciably more stuff, both on and off the dance floor. She went to the beach with partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy, which spelled backward is "Brawny Lad." And Mario took Karina Smirnoff to a friend's very plush swimming pool, where he rubbed a li'l cocoa butter on her back before playfully pushing her in the drink.

Willa and Maksim supposedly are having a tempestuous affair. "We have great chemistry no matter what we're doing," she said when co-host Samantha Harris trolled for more hot dish.

The audience o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oohed at that, prompting another quick-on-the-draw ad lib from glib ringmaster Tom Bergeron.

"So Willa's dancing has improved, and her ability to dig a hole has improved," he said.

Wednesday's results show reduces the field to six, with viewers' and judges' votes split 50-50. Prediction: Joey Lawrence will be the next evictee on a show where built-in fan bases are the great equalizer.